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Topic: Just Throwing It out There...

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AuthorTopic:   Just Throwing It out There...
Registered User

posted: 6/13/2002 at 12:09:17 PM ET
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Hello all, I had the absolute pleasure seeing Bernadette Peters in Sydney, doing the exact concert she did at Carnagie Hall, at the Sydney Opera House about three or four years ago. I fell in love with Bernadette's ultimate personality and charm as a performer, long before that anyway. As you would also be aware Bernadette is a strong fan of Stephen Sondhiem, and so am I.

The next part of my post is very true, and I am not steeling anything from the songstress or composers, however what I have done, is creat a mini musical of my life, as I was a sexually abused child, I am now 35.

It touches me greatly that both Bernadette and Stephen have been a great saviour and mentor in my life, to this point, I am still healing.

The purpose of this post is to share what I believe most of you would share, which is a love for Musicals, and both Bernadette and Stephen.

The only deletion I will make is my last name:

Enjoy what I have writen, as im sure you will all know every song if not most, and would be able to visualize, the impact im trying to give my psychologist.

Rick 35

Richard The Musical.


Dear Katrina,

During my lifetime and up to this point 35 years of age, I have been more than fascinated with Musicals and the Theatre, to some point my passion for musicals and the songs within the musicals always seemed to touch an emotional cord, weather nice or not so nice and saved me from the real world.

I have collated a collaboration of songs together from many different musicals to make up my own musical; this will give you further insight into my own character.

The whole Richard The Musical is totally taped in metaphor, as my favorite composer has always written in metaphor, the Marvelous Mr. Steven Sondheim and Jesus as well actually!

If I were just to only give you these two tapes and say listen, you would have no idea of just what I am trying to portray to you, or any other listener. As all songs are from different shows or at different stages of a show. The Musical goes for two hours. If you like, this in it self can be a session I sign for, instead of an actual visit, as this musical might even trigger emotions within your self. At the very least you will know me allot better from within. I will point out the metaphor in each song and title it, just like a normal musical program, so sit back and relax and enjoy.


Part 1.

1. Overture: From Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street.

2. Putting It Together: Shows the whole presentation to ensure the listener knows and appreciates the work, commitment and dedication involved in creating this musical of my life, the proís the conís, the hurts, the love, the highs and the lows.

3. Hello Little Girl: = Hello Little Boy = How I was hijacked off the righteous path, seduced/transformed and abused by Pedophiles at seven years of age. This song also shows a Pedophileís cunning and manipulative mind.

4. Itís A Hard Knock Life: By Eleven/Twelve years of age when Annie was released at Her Majesties Theatre in Sydney, this particular song hit a cord with in me, knowing somehow, my life will not be normal and full of Hard knocks including all of my Physical/Sexual and Mental abuse at school and beyond. And with only a grandmother = Mum to try and defend me, difficult to say the least, not to mention all of the previous abuse upon myself by adult males from seven.

5. I know Things Now: I have been assimilated by this time into a life of sex addiction, and homosexuality, and somehow enjoyed it by getting attention and knowing it was wrong, and I certainly learnt nice is totally different than good, though as in Death Of A Salesman ďAttention Must Be PaidĒ and I certainly got that-however from the wrong area.

6. Some People: This is to show my determination to get out of school and away from this rotten life that I have seemed to have been dealt, I am now 14 and about to turn 15 years of age, move to Adelaide to my biological Motherís house only to return with in a week, as the children (my half Brother and Sister) there were experiencing Physical abuse and I wanted nothing of it.

7. Unexpected Song: I am 15 years of age (Just). Les (Master Pedophile) introduces me to Paul as Paulís boy on May 2 1982. What I think is love, is totally against the law and my mind over the next coming years is totally corrupted and manipulated by these people along with mental and physical abuse. However at this stage in my life (15) I thought it was love. No 15 year old understands true love, they just think they do.

8. Something Bad Is Spreading Around: Introduction to HIV/AIDS, and I coped abuse from the early part of the year (Jan through to March) at school 1982. Children can be awful. (The school thought I was born In February 19/1967 and not April 1967) as Mum changed my age to get me, into Primary School early.
Now I'm in a homosexual so called relationship with two men (May/2 1982), talk about mind screwing around, all of this to worry about as a child.

9.Our Little World: Mum gets sick, has a stroke and wants Christine and myself at her side always, the song says ď HairĒ is the binding gel, in my case it is Mumís multiple diseases.
This is while I am still in this bizarre relationship and now just starting to work as a Junior Hairdresser, Still 15. To this point Mum is not quite sure what I am up to, however she has her suspicions.

10. Stay With Me: Mum finds out for sure, November 2, 1982 that I am so called gay and in a relationship and forbids me to go back, and she then proceeds to report the Pedophiles to police and nothing happens, and would hope her child would listen for future health.

11. How Did I End Up Here: I am now about 17/18 and totally confused about everything, my work life is on the rocks going up and down, mum is sick and my so called relationship is going haywire and I'm on sleeping pills, this song shows Iím going crazy about everything at an young age.

12.Words He Doesnít Say: I'm now starting to realize this so called relationship is hurting me badly in many ways and is in no way normal, yet Iím still feeling gay and keep at it, and work the relationship to see if it works. This song could have been sung to me by many a man wanting my affections.

13. Take That Look Off Your Face: I truly know inside the relationship is over, though it is pointed out to me by the obvious of a new introduction, a new 16-year-old boy onto the scene for their taking, I have just realized I am used as Child Bait throughout the Youth of Australia Association they ran and organized.

14. Thief In The Night: Shows my Anger and Passion of a multitude of emotions, especially being replaced. (Thatís how I perceived it then) I now have found a new emotion that works for me HATRED.

15. Lets Talk About You: My newfound emotions will never allow me to be hurt again by anybody or anything (So I believe). Richard is now Turing into a bitch, using all the assimilated knowledge he has learned throughout the years.

Part 2.

1. Know you Know: This is an awareness song of me trying to take stock of my life considering all factors, the relationship is over (Praise God) and I am trying to get on with things, life in general.

2. You Could Never Shame Me: Mum has become sicker, (with an amputation of her large toe not to far away in the future) Christine is tired from caring, I'm now working at Norman Ross whilst living at home and trying my best to keep everything going well for all of us while feeling sick myself (Emotionally and Physically), yet feeling I have made Mum Sicker through my Homosexuality Acts.

3. No More: I have had it with men and everything; inside I just want to die so badly. Again I am back at anger stage and on full red alert for anybody or anything to hurt me, and if they do watch out! Itís just going to be Mum, Christine and Myself.

4.How Can I Win: All of my senses and emotions are at an all time loss and low, trying to hang onto life, and I decide to put my life into career mode and forget emotions and people, and purely focus on developing my career skills.

5. American Dream: I have now been fully trained in Public Speaking, Promotions, Wholesale and Retail. This song is about dreaming of my full potential in the corporate world. At this time period I'm 24 through to 26 and at a young age of 24 I become the Store Manager Of Thorn EMI Radio Rentals Burwood, with staff and responsibilities, and the high life that goes with it. Although still living at home with Mum and Christine, which gives Richard a lot of money to spend on a great many things, including drugs.

6.Party: The corporate world to me at this stage is NO different to the emotional world all False, Lies, Backstabbing, insincerity and God forbid you should give any opinion of your own, however you continue to play the corporate game. Needless to say Iím still dealing with my sexuality, Mum being sick and all associated problems, whilst putting on a happy face, by this stage Iím a pothead as well and partying hard in the Gay Social world, (the most false of all).

7. Another Hundred People: Starting to feel pretty sick of the corporate world as I just feel a number, and know I can do better work wise. I truly believe at this stage trees are more important than budgets, as there is so much happening at home. People are now becoming my focus and not succumbing to the pressures of keeping up budgets and training parrot sales personal. For visual aid think of the commuters on trains and busses every day, doing their robotic thing.

8. No One Is Alone: Self-explanatory. (MUM PASSES AWAY)
29 March 1915 - April 19th 1998. Her age at passing away was 83, and you will also notice, that day was my birthday. Richardís true birth date is, April 19th 1967.

9. Where Is the Love: Still confused emotionally, wanting to fit in somewhere/somehow, however not really sure where to park myself, so I now find real drugs, more sex addiction, more covering up my emotions and whilst putting on that happy face I have over the years mastered to do so well, and this is whilst I am now doing Television Info commercials on Good Morning Australia with Bert Newton.

10. Epiphany: Richard develops HIV, and seeks revenge on any and everybody who has ever hurt him. This song shows my incredible anger and hatred.
The time frame is March 2000. I also become a freelance promoter for income and not relying on one source, until July 2001 when, four doctors decide to write me off from the work place environment.

11. All Good Gifts: Richard gets a gift from God (July 2001), PEPPIE and becomes Born Again, after surviving two suicide attempts and lying on the floor with who knows what dripping from his bottom from a Homosexual back room. Jesus saves Richard from Richard, though Richard still holds incredible anger although now Christian, and has also given up his Homosexual ways, and all immoral behavior he now feels he has to fight for the right of the good.

12. Perfectly Alone: None of the people who hurt me will never know how much they did, though I will do it Perfectly Alone, with my new found knowledge of Law, Justice, Politics and Advocacy. I will use all new techniques with my past trained skills to ensure my healing and help others, as I have always said ďthe needs of the many outweigh the needs of the fewĒ and Iím the few. August 2001, unknown at this stage nobody knows what I have in mind.

Part 3.

1. Everybody Sayís Donít: It is now August 2001 and I decide to charge all Pedophile offenders to myself, the threat of loosing so called friends over this decision is an issue-though one that I will bare. Police action started, Lobbying started, Richard is now back in control and in attack mode.

2. Dayís Like This: Late December 2001 my immune system drops to an all time low, yes I am told I am sick and must go on medication immediately or else I will die in approximately a year and a half through an AIDS related Illness, Medication started in January 2002.

3. There Wonít Be Trumpets: Richard gets his strength back and most importantly his determination, though still trying to fix his emotions, hoping for a hero to come along, Jesus/ Pastor/Counselor, or am I maybe the hero?

4. Martine Gurerre = Richard is back and watch out! Past people who hurt me, will be getting their just deserts, and any present or future people who hurt me watch out too.

5. Being Alive: This is a song of telling of what I want, and so far Christine my Aunty and Peppie my Assist Animal gives it to me. Though no other human has or probably will.

6. Nobodies On Nobodies Side: After all Police investigations and Associated causes I put my self in front of, (Legal/Political or otherwise) I now realize I need to be on my side. More importantly it shows my lack of trust for anybody, except my Aunty and Peppie. I have also become aware throw a cat among the pigeons and watch them fly.

7.The Challenge: This is a song about foresight and inner thoughts for what might be, in the distant future. Although in the song they are referring to women and chess, ultimately itís about challenges and who is going to win. Put my self in the second voice that starts singing.

8. Move On: Is an inspirational song where I am at this point in life, in fact this particular song, when originally sung in America at Carnegie Hall was dedicated to all HIV/AIDS sufferers.

9. Finishing The Hat: Is a song sung in total metaphor softly, to explain how one gathers information, dissects it, probes it, forms it, and trying not to be distracted and finally finishing the Hat.

10. Come Hell Or High Water: This song is to explain I will not stop at any price (including my death) to achieve what I believe in, although it may upset the apple cart of society. Warned by people and/or organizations to stop, I will not.

11. Children Will Listen: This is a very powerful song, regarding Children and how wrong influence can change their destiny and fate. It warns of what parents tell their Children, or any other adult for that matter. In closing Richard now fights for Children and Child Protection and more importantly his own rights.



The female voice you hear the most on this particular musical is none other than the Queen Of Broadway, and rightfully disserves this title is: Miss Bernadette Peters.

The main composer writer of Music and Lyrics is none other than the King of Broadway, Mr. Steven Sondheim.

All other writers are below:

Martin Charnin
William Finn
Barry Harman
Jon English
Tim Rice
Kander & Ebb
Marvin Hamlish
Bourbilil & Schonberg
Alex Harding
Steven Swartz
John Bettis
Bjorn Borg.

If the above raises any triggers in anybodies life, feel free to email me.

Love and healing Richard


Registered User

posted: 4/22/2003 at 12:45:21 AM ET
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wow... um.... WOW

Registered User


posted: 5/3/2003 at 6:15:09 PM ET
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Since i am almost never at a loss for words I would just like to say. You did it before the Parade passed you by and that is what counts.

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